A history of the kiss
It comes from far away
Geographically and in time. If we believe our old books, the first to have had the idea of kissing to greet each other were the Persians of Antiquity. With, already, codes. According to the Greek historian Herodotus, among the Persians, equals kissed on the mouth. If one of the two is less high socially the codes change. The one who is less high socially kisses the higher one on the cheek. As a slave, he kneels before his "superior" and is not allowed to kiss. Among the Hebrews, one can kiss on the cheek when one has not seen each other for a long time and when one is from the same family. Among the Greeks, the kiss marks an agreement for a contract.
And also from the Romans
The Romans had three ways of kissing. The first, ceremonial, was the oath kiss, in public, called "osculum". The second, warmer, was the "saevium", very sensual, and reserved for pleasure, the ancestor of the French kiss in fact. Finally, there was a third way of kissing: the "baesium", for family members or very close people. It is from this word "baesium" that the words "baiser" and "bise" come in French. The kiss has a stronger connotation of tenderness than the kiss. The one is stronger than the other. And the uses for both practices have evolved over time.
The kiss of peace: Photo chosen by Monsieurdefrance.com: Public domain, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=17895988
A practice that has always "moved
In the Middle Ages, the kiss was rare. One rarely kisses, even in family. The kiss fades away in favor of the kiss that becomes something important and that marks something. There is the kiss of peace, on the mouth, between religious people. One kisses the hand of one's suzerain when one is a vassal. However, one can also kiss the hand of a beautiful woman if she grants it to you. It is from this time that the famous hand kissing dates (it is a whole art the hand kiss! We explain it to you at the bottom of this article).
Well ... It is true... It's not always easy to kiss.
In the Renaissance, the kiss is back, between peers, between friends we can mark the friendship by a kiss. It is also a way of kissing, on the cheek, a lover. At the end of the Renaissance, the kiss becomes a habit in the family. We kiss each other between relatives. Rarely with friends. This habit was maintained in the 19th century.
The 20th century widened the circle of "kissable" people. One can kiss family members, but also close friends. After the Second World War, the habit of kissing to greet each other was established, even if one did not know each other very well. It is even a little invasive, the kiss, since the codes impose little by little that a woman greets by making the kiss, as well as for the children, which is not the case for a man. The end of the 20th century saw the kiss imposed between men.
Less a habit but a real choice now.
Kissing is not as common as it used to be. Many people do not kiss, others reserve it for very close friends. It still marks a certain consideration for the person to whom we kiss. We go back to older practices, to mark the affection to the close ones. COVID is not responsible, even if it has accentuated things when the kiss was identified as a possibility of contagion since the people are close: in fact, the habit has been changing for a few years, especially for women to whom society no longer imposes to kiss and it is so much better.
Kissing has long been a real French tradition, it is less important now.
Regional disparities that persist
Kissing to greet each other is not the same in every region of France. Above the Loire River, people tend to kiss on the right cheek in most regions, while in the South they start with the left cheek. More than half of the regions of France practice the double kiss: one on the right and one on the left. In the south, around Tarn, Lozere, we often do 3 kisses. In the Pays de la Loire, especially in Mayenne, in Sarthe, but also in Basse-Normandie, we often do 4 kisses (I don't tell you the neck when you arrive last and you have to kiss the whole table... )
How to do the hand kiss ?
The hand kiss has become very romantic ! Photo chosen by Monsieurdefrance.com : Shutterstock/FuzzBones
It is really not frequent but it is still practiced in some families. The code is quite simple: the man bows and if, and only if, the woman holds out her hand, he puts it in his and bows low enough to approach the lady's hand without ever putting his lips on it. The man must never raise the hand or arm of the woman he is greeting, he is the one who goes down.
